Once again Murphy and his laws! Only this time we present you with Murphy’s LOVE LAWS!
- All the good ones are taken.
- If the person isn’t taken, there’s a reason.
- The nicer someone is, the farther away (s)he is from you.
- Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant.
This constant is always zero.
- Money can’t buy love, but it sure gets you a great bargaining position.
- The best things in the world are free – and worth every penny of it.
- Every kind action has a not-so-kind reaction.
- Nice guys (girls) finish last.
- If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
- Availability is a function of time. The minute you get interested is the minute they find someone else.
- Nothing improves with age.
- No matter how many times you’ve had it, if it’s offered take it, because it’ll never be quite the same again.
- There is no remedy for sex but more sex.
- Sex appeal is 50% what you’ve got and 50% what people think you’ve got.
- No sex with anyone in the same office.
- If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
- When a man’s wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.
- Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
- The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same ones she can’t stand years later.
- Sex is dirty only if it’s done right.
- Before you find your handsome prince, you’ve got to kiss a lot of frogs.
- There may be some things better than sex, and some things worse than sex. But there is nothing exactly like it.
- Love your neighbor, but don’t get caught.
- Thou shalt not commit adultery…..unless in the mood.
- Never argue with a women when she’s tired — or rested.
- A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he couldn’t.
I hope you enjoyed reading these funny love laws…I know I did!